"there are only two things you should never worry about," said a wise old man once to his youthful companion; "firstly, the things you can"t help, and, secondly, the things you can help! it is very clear that you should not worry about the first, because, if you can"t help it, as the saying is, why make any fuss or give way to useless repinings1? and if you can help it, don"t lose time worrying, but go to work at once and help it !""you seem to have a fine healthy crop."1 useless repinings: vain regrets.
two gardeners, who were neighbours, had their crops of early peas killed by frost; one of them came to condole with the other on his misfortune.
"ah!" cried he, "how unfortunate we have been, neighbour! doyou know i have done nothing but fret ever since? but you seemto have a fine healthy crop coming up already; what are these?""these!" cried the other gardener, "why, these are what i sowed immediately after my loss !""what! coming up already?" cried the fretter. "yes; while you were fretting i was working." "what! don"t you fret when you have a loss?""yes; but i always put it off until after i have repaired the mischief.""why, then you have no need to fret at all?""true!" replied the industrious gardener; "and that"s the very reason."what a jewel good temper is! how we all delight to be with friends who are cheery and pleasant! their presence is like sunshine, and their words make the heart joyful. "but," you say, "it is so natural to lose one"s temper. things go wrong so easily. other people are unpleasant and make promises they cannot fulfil, and say hard words, and refuse to do a kindness."no doubt many trifles which try the temper happen in the course of the day. however, such trifles should be regarded only as excellent chances to display good humour. a friend once found wilberforce1 in great agitation looking for a despatch he had mislaid, for which one of the royal family was waiting.
1 wilberforce (1759-1833): a very benevolent man; took a leading part in securing the abolition of slavery in the british dominions.
at the very moment, as if to make it more trying to his temper, a disturbance was heard in the nursery overhead.
"now," thought the friend, "surely for once his temper will give way." the thought had hardly passed through his mind, when wilberforce turned to him, and said, "what a blessing it is to hear those dear children! only think what a relief, among other hurries1, to hear their voices, and to know they are well!" then there are some persons who are made angry by very little things. they take offence at the slightest words, and read a wrong meaning into most innocent deeds. they are ever ready to quarrel with any or every body. they remind us of john lilburne2, who, cromwell tells us, was so quarrelsome that, if he could find nobody else to quarrel with, john would quarrelwith lilburne, and lilburne with john.
some people are always grumbling; if they had been born in the garden of eden they would not have been quite satisfied. others are happy anywhere. if it rains, they can think of all the good the rain does to the thirsty earth; if the sun shines, they remember how the warm rays bring out the flowers and ripen the fruit.
it is the cheerful and hopeful person who, in the long run, succeeds. of course we cannot all be happy at a moment"s notice. but if we try to look at the bright side of things, and search for the good qualities in our neighbours and friends, and do our part in life with a pleasant grace, it is wonderful how happy we shall become.
men never break down, it is said, as long as they can keep cheerful. a merry heart is a continual feast to others beside itself.
1other hurries: urgent matters; things pressing to be done.
2john lilburne: an english agitator who lived in the time of charles i and cromwell, by each of whom he was imprisoned.
"the shadow of florence nightingale1," says lord avebury2, "cured more than her medicines"; and if we share the burdens of others we lighten our own.
happiness cannot be bought with money nor can it be grasped by power. there is a persian story that the great king, being out of spirits, consulted his astrologers3, and was told that happiness could be found by wearing the shirt of a perfectly happy man. the court and all the prosperous classes4 in the country were searched in vain. no such man could be discovered. at last a labourer coming from his work was found to fulfil the condition; he was absolutely happy. but, alas! the remedy was as far off as over. the man had no shirt.
-compiled by e.w.h.f.
were i so tall to reach the pole,
or grasp the ocean with my span, i must be measured by my soul;the mind"s the standard of the man.
-watts
1florence nightingale (1820-1910): famous organiser of a nursing system during the crimean war.
2lord avebury (1834-1913): scientist; student of insect life; formerly sir john lubbock; wrote pleasures of life, beauties of nature, ants, bees, and wasps, &c.
3astrologers: those who pretend to foretell events by the stars. 4 prosperous classes: well-to-do people.
