登陆注册
37340700000084

第84章

She had let go the outer world, but within herself she was unbroken and unimpaired.She only sat in her room like a moping, dishevelled hawk, motionless, mindless.Her children, for whom she had been so fierce in her youth, now meant scarcely anything to her.She had lost all that, she was quite by herself.Only Gerald, the gleaming, had some existence for her.But of late years, since he had become head of the business, he too was forgotten.Whereas the father, now he was dying, turned for compassion to Gerald.There had always been opposition between the two of them.Gerald had feared and despised his father, and to a great extent had avoided him all through boyhood and young manhood.And the father had felt very often a real dislike of his eldest son, which, never wanting to give way to, he had refused to acknowledge.He had ignored Gerald as much as possible, leaving him alone.

Since, however, Gerald had come home and assumed responsibility in the firm, and had proved such a wonderful director, the father, tired and weary of all outside concerns, had put all his trust of these things in his son, implicitly, leaving everything to him, and assuming a rather touching dependence on the young enemy.This immediately roused a poignant pity and allegiance in Gerald's heart, always shadowed by contempt and by unadmitted enmity.

For Gerald was in reaction against Charity; and yet he was dominated by it, it assumed supremacy in the inner life, and he could not confute it.

So he was partly subject to that which his father stood for, but he was in reaction against it.Now he could not save himself.A certain pity and grief and tenderness for his father overcame him, in spite of the deeper, more sullen hostility.

The father won shelter from Gerald through compassion.But for love he had Winifred.She was his youngest child, she was the only one of his children whom he had ever closely loved.And her he loved with all the great, overweening, sheltering love of a dying man.He wanted to shelter her infinitely, infinitely, to wrap her in warmth and love and shelter, perfectly.If he could save her she should never know one pain, one grief, one hurt.He had been so right all his life, so constant in his kindness and his goodness.And this was his last passionate righteousness, his love for the child Winifred.Some things troubled him yet.The world had passed away from him, as his strength ebbed.There were no more poor and injured and humble to protect and succour.These were all lost to him.There were no more sons and daughters to trouble him, and to weigh on him as an unnatural responsibility.These too had faded out of reality All these things had fallen out of his hands, and left him free.

There remained the covert fear and horror of his wife, as she sat mindless and strange in her room, or as she came forth with slow, prowling step, her head bent forward.But this he put away.Even his life-long righteousness, however, would not quite deliver him from the inner horror.Still, he could keep it sufficiently at bay.It would never break forth openly.Death would come first.

Then there was Winifred! If only he could be sure about her, if only he could be sure.Since the death of Diana, and the development of his illness, his craving for surety with regard to Winifred amounted almost to obsession.It was as if, even dying, he must have some anxiety, some responsibility of love, of Charity, upon his heart.

She was an odd, sensitive, inflammable child, having her father's dark hair and quiet bearing, but being quite detached, momentaneous.She was like a changeling indeed, as if her feelings did not matter to her, really.

She often seemed to be talking and playing like the gayest and most childish of children, she was full of the warmest, most delightful affection for a few things -- for her father, and for her animals in particular.But if she heard that her beloved kitten Leo had been run over by the motor-car she put her head on one side, and replied, with a faint contraction like resentment on her face: `Has he?' Then she took no more notice.She only disliked the servant who would force bad news on her, and wanted her to be sorry.She wished not to know, and that seemed her chief motive.She avoided her mother, and most of the members of her family.She loved her Daddy, because he wanted her always to be happy, and because he seemed to become young again, and irresponsible in her presence.She liked Gerald, because he was so self-contained.She loved people who would make life a game for her.She had an amazing instinctive critical faculty, and was a pure anarchist, a pure aristocrat at once.For she accepted her equals wherever she found them, and she ignored with blithe indifference her inferiors, whether they were her brothers and sisters, or whether they were wealthy guests of the house, or whether they were the common people or the servants.

She was quite single and by herself, deriving from nobody.It was as if she were cut off from all purpose or continuity, and existed simply moment by moment.

The father, as by some strange final illusion, felt as if all his fate depended on his ensuring to Winifred her happiness.She who could never suffer, because she never formed vital connections, she who could lose the dearest things of her life and be just the same the next day, the whole memory dropped out, as if deliberately, she whose will was so strangely and easily free, anarchistic, almost nihilistic, who like a soulless bird flits on its own will, without attachment or responsibility beyond the moment, who in her every motion snapped the threads of serious relationship with blithe, free hands, really nihilistic, because never troubled, she must be the object of her father's final passionate solicitude.

When Mr Crich heard that Gudrun Brangwen might come to help Winifred with her drawing and modelling he saw a road to salvation for his child.

同类推荐
  • 清暑笔谈

    清暑笔谈

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 金光明最胜忏仪

    金光明最胜忏仪

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 律戒本疏

    律戒本疏

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 樊山政书

    樊山政书

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 大宋中兴通俗演义岳王传

    大宋中兴通俗演义岳王传

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
热门推荐
  • 主神的丧尸进化之路

    主神的丧尸进化之路

    你见过在古代横行无忌的丧尸吗?你见过在奥特曼宇宙中出现的丧尸泰坦吗?这是讲述一个中二病得到一块空白模板,然后脑洞大开的故事。
  • 五行逆传

    五行逆传

    九州大陆,万年之后,九子出世,天怒人愿。-------《轩辕志》万年以来多少武林巨头对此耿耿于怀,这九子究竟有何神通,可以惹天怒,遂人愿。万年大世即将到来!九子指的是哪九子?为何惹天怒却遂人愿?李尘到底能在轩辕大陆留下怎样的传说?让我们拭目以待!!
  • 云长行

    云长行

    千年前,一场巨变,改变了天地元力。神仙们打断了通往仙界的接天路。从此,人间修士在也不能白日飞升,羽化成仙了。然修道之人,心性坚韧。他们不甘永堕尘世,仙道无缘。人间修士费劲心力,集齐散落人间的开天神器,妄图另辟通道,飞升成仙,却没想到引发变故。于是故事就从这里开始了...
  • 轮回镜缘

    轮回镜缘

    神劫将至,而我想通过这个故事来讲诉一些人:肩负家族使命忍辱负重三百年却功亏一篑的青帝!纵横妖界横扫冥王殿的帝级妖兽黎凡!单纯善良却被仇恨缠身火凰传人的上官燕!同父异母却走上相反道路的君辰与君钰!以及风华绝代,手摘星辰的星帝!…………总之,这是一段有关爱的故事,也是一段天地人三界共抗神劫的热血故事。
  • 日娱之外行人

    日娱之外行人

    金手指?自己想办法做个吧!外行人?总有一天……
  • 天行

    天行

    号称“北辰骑神”的天才玩家以自创的“牧马冲锋流”战术击败了国服第一弓手北冥雪,被誉为天纵战榜第一骑士的他,却受到小人排挤,最终离开了效力已久的银狐俱乐部。是沉沦,还是再次崛起?恰逢其时,月恒集团第四款游戏“天行”正式上线,虚拟世界再起风云!
  • 天行

    天行

    号称“北辰骑神”的天才玩家以自创的“牧马冲锋流”战术击败了国服第一弓手北冥雪,被誉为天纵战榜第一骑士的他,却受到小人排挤,最终离开了效力已久的银狐俱乐部。是沉沦,还是再次崛起?恰逢其时,月恒集团第四款游戏“天行”正式上线,虚拟世界再起风云!
  • 世界异能录

    世界异能录

    被一颗小慧星撞到后,高迁的生活变得不再平凡,拥有“复制”的能力使他变得无人能敌。
  • 天行

    天行

    号称“北辰骑神”的天才玩家以自创的“牧马冲锋流”战术击败了国服第一弓手北冥雪,被誉为天纵战榜第一骑士的他,却受到小人排挤,最终离开了效力已久的银狐俱乐部。是沉沦,还是再次崛起?恰逢其时,月恒集团第四款游戏“天行”正式上线,虚拟世界再起风云!
  • 校霸大人动心了

    校霸大人动心了

    身为一届校霸,傅延川竟然沦落到去当人家的小尾巴,还臭不要脸地邀请人家去看他打篮球。作为高冷女神+小神医(高智商的女主,自学成才),夏清浅还能说什么?当然是二话不说让他滚蛋。这小尾巴当然不能消停了,一个劲的装作处处可怜的样子让浅浅女神给他包扎伤口。给他点好脸色就得寸进尺,还敢背地里说这是他老婆,真是给他脸了……