On the fifth day of November, 1718, which to the aera fixed on, was as near nine kalendar months as any husband could in reason have expected,--was ITristram Shandy, Gentleman, brought forth into this scurvy and disastrous world of ours.--I wish I had been born in the Moon, or in any of the planets, (except Jupiter or Saturn, because I never could bear cold weather) for it could not well have fared worse with me in any of them (though I will not answer for Venus) than it has in this vile, dirty planet of ours,--which, o' my conscience, with reverence be it spoken, I take to be made up of the shreds and clippings of the rest;--not but the planet is well enough, provided a man could be born in it to a great title or to a great estate; or could any how contrive to be called up to public charges, and employments of dignity or power;--but that is not my case;--and therefore every man will speak of the fair as his own market has gone in it;--for which cause I affirm it over again to be one of the vilest worlds that ever was made;--for I can truly say, that from the first hour I drew my breath in it, to this, that I can now scarce draw it at all, for an asthma I got in scating against the wind in Flanders;--I have been the continual sport of what the world calls Fortune; and though I will not wrong her by saying, She has ever made me feel the weight of any great or signal evil;--yet with all the good temper in the world I affirm it of her, that in every stage of my life, and at every turn and corner where she could get fairly at me, the ungracious duchess has pelted me with a set of as pitiful misadventures and cross accidents as ever small Hero sustained.
同类推荐
热门推荐
中国禁毒史(谷臻小简·AI导读版)
罂粟,这原本普普通通的植物背后,是整个一部罪恶史;鸦片,这一特殊的商品,是透析列强对近代中国经济侵略的钥匙。让我们了解鸦片烟毒曾带给中国人的无尽痛苦和沉沦、巨大灾难和耻辱,以及历届政府所作的不懈努力。