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第27章 选择乐观Choode Optimism

佚名/Anonymous

如果你预料某事会很糟糕,那么它很可能真会这样。悲观的想法一般都能实现。反过来,这个原理同样成立。如果你料想会好运连连,通常也会这样!乐观和成功之间似乎有一种天然的因果关系。乐观和悲观都是强大的力量,我们塑造和展望未来,都必须从中作出选择。每个人的生命中都有太多的幸运或灾难:充满着忧伤和快乐、无限的喜悦和痛苦——不论我们是悲观还是乐观,都有充分的理由。我们可以选择哭或笑、祝福或诅咒。这是我们的决定:选择用什么样的眼光来看待人生?是在希望中昂首阔步,还是在绝望中低头长叹?我喜欢展望未来。我选择关注积极面,忽视消极面。我是乐观主义者,更多的是因为我的选择,而非天性。当然,我知道,生命中总存在着悲伤。

现在,我已经70多岁了,经历过太多灾难。但是,当一切尘埃落定,我发现生命中的美好远多于丑恶。乐观的态度并非奢侈品,而是一种必需。你看待生活的方式决定了你如何去感受、去表现,以及你与他人如何相处。相反地,消极的思想、态度和预想也决定了这些,它们成为一种能自我实现的预言。悲观会制造一种阴沉的生活,没有人愿意活在其中。几年前,我开车去一个加油站加油。那天天气很晴朗,我心情很好。当我进站付油费时,服务员对我说:“你感觉怎么样啊?”这个问题有些莫名其妙,但我感觉很好,也这样跟他说了。“你脸色不大好。”他说。我十分惊讶,于是,我告诉他,我确实感觉不错,但已不再信心十足了。他毫不犹豫地继续说我的脸色如何不好,连皮肤都发黄了。

我心神不宁地离开加油站,开了一个街区后,我把车停在路边,照着镜子看看自己的脸。我怎么了?是不是得黄疸病了?一切都正常吗?回 到家时,我开始想吐了,我的肝脏是不是出了问题?我不会染上什么怪病了吧?我再次去那个加油站时,又感觉不错了,也明白了究竟是怎么一回 事。这个地方最近涂了一种明亮、胆汁质的黄色油漆,灯光反射在墙壁上,让里面的人看起来像是得了肝炎。我想,不知道有多少人也有过类似的经历呢!我的心情因为与一个完全陌生的人短暂交谈,整整改变了一天。他告诉我,我看起来像生病了,而后不久,我真的感觉不舒服。这个消极的观点,深刻地影响了我的感受和行为。唯一比消极更具力量的是一个积极的肯定,一句乐观和希望的言辞。最让我欣慰的是,我是在一个有着乐观主义光荣传统的国度里成长的。当整体文化积极向上时,再难以置信的事也能完成。当世界看起来充满希望时,人们就会在这个积极的场所努力向上,并获得成功。乐观并不需要变得幼稚,我们可以在成为乐观者的同时,仍意识到问题的存在,有些甚至难以解决。但是,乐观使解决问题的态度有所不同!乐观会使我们把注意力从消极转到积极的、建设性的思考上。如果你是一个乐观者,会更关心问题的解决,而不是毫无价值地怨天尤人。事实上,如果没有乐观主义精神,一些现存的巨大问题,如贫穷,就毫无希望解决。它需要一个梦想家——一个拥有绝对乐观、矢志不渝、坚定信念的人——来解决这个巨大的问题。乐观,或是悲观,在于你的选择。

If you expect something to turn out badly,it probably will.Pessimism is seldom disappointed.But the same principle also works in reverse.If you expect good things to happen,they usually do!There seems to be a natural cause-andeffect relationship between optimism and success.Optimism and pessimism are both powerful forces,and each of us must choose which we want to shape our outlook and our expectations.There is enough good and bad in everyone’s life—ample sorrow and happiness,sufficient joy and pain—to find a rational basis for either optimism or pessimism.We can choose to laugh or cry,bless or curse.It’s our decision:From which perspective do we want to view life?Will we look up in hope or down in despair?I believe in the upward look.I choose to highlight the positive and slip right over the negative.I am an optimist by choice as much as by nature.Sure,I know that sorrow exists.I am in my 70s now,and I’ve lived through more than one crisis.But when all is said and done,I find that the good in life far outweighs the bad.An optimistic attitude is not a luxury;it’s a necessity.

The way you look at life will determine how you feel,how you perform,and how well you will get along with other people.Conversely,negative thoughts,attitudes,and expectations feed on themselves;they become a self-fulfilling prophecy.Pessimism creates a dismal place where no one wants to live.Years ago,I drove into a service station to get some gas.It was a beautiful day,and I was feeling great.As I walked into the station to pay for the gas,the attendant said to me,“How do you feel?”That seemed like an odd question,but I felt fine and told him so.“You don’t look well,”he replied.This took me completely by surprise.A little less confidently,I told him that I had never felt better.Without hesitation,he continued to tell me how bad I looked and that my skin appeared yellow.By the time I left the service station,I was feeling a little uneasy.About a block away,I pulled over to the side of the road to look at my face in the mirror.How did I feel?Was I jaundiced?Was everything all right?By the time I got home,I was beginning to feel a little queasy.Did I have a bad liver?Had I picked up some rare disease?The next time I went into that gas station,feeling fine again,I figured out what had happened.The place had recently been painted a bright,bilious yellow,and the light reflecting off the walls made everyone inside look as though they had hepatitis!I wondered how many other folks had reacted the way I did.I had let one short conversation with a total stranger change my attitude for an entire day.He told me I looked sick,and before long,I was actually feeling sick.That single negative observation had a profound effect on the way I felt and acted.

The only thing more powerful than negativism is a positive affirmation,a word of optimism and hope.One of the things I am most thankful for is the fact that I have grown up in a nation with a grand tradition of optimism.When a whole culture adopts an upward look,incredible things can be accomplished.When the world is seen as a hopeful,positive place,people are empowered to attempt and to achieve.Optimism doesn’t need to be naive.We can be an optimist and still recognize that problems exist and that some of them are not dealt with easily.But what a difference optimism makes in the attitude of the problem solver!Optimism diverts our attention away from negativism and channels it into positive,constructive thinking.When you’re an optimist,you’re more concerned with problem-solving than with useless carping about issues.In fact,without optimism,issues as big and ongoing as poverty have no hope of solution.It takes a dreamer—someone with hopelessly optimistic ideas,great persistence,and unlimited confidence—to tackle a problem that big.It’s your choice.

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