This elderly lady，recently widowed，decides to see if a pet will ease her loneliness and goes to the pet store。She decides against puppies，kitties，etc。And when she is about to leave the store she hears a voice saying，“My，you look lovely this afternoon，madam。”
She turns around quickly to see who has spoken，but there is no one。All she sees is a big green parrot，resting on his perch in his cage。“Did you say that？”she asks。“Why，yes，I did！”he replies。“And may I add that dress is a very nice color for you。”The lady suddenly realizes how nice it will be to not only have a talking parrot，but one that pays such nice compliments。So she pays for him and takes him home。On the way，she says，“You know，I am so proud of you that I believe I'll take you out for dinner！Would you like that？”The parrot says，“Why yes，that will be delightful。I know a charming place on 7th Street。”
So they arrive at home and the lady progresses upstairs to her room to change for dinner，bringing the parrot along，of course。When the woman enters the building，the parrot begins complaining，swearing，and even bit her once。
Well，the woman is flabbergasted！She grabs the parrot by the throat，marches down the stairs into the basement，and stuffs the parrot in the freezer。She leaves him there in the freezer for five long minutes before taking him back out。The parrot is very cold。
She says，“Well。Have you learned your lesson？I will not tolerate such language in my house！”The parrot says，“Okay，okay，I promise it won't happen again。I am deeply sorry。”Within five minutes，he is cursing again and bit her once on the arm and once on the finger。
The lady is absolutely stunned。She rips the parrot out of his cage，goes down the stairs，into the cellar，and slames into the freezer。This time，she leaves him in for fifteen minutes。
When she finally takes him out，the parrot is one step away from death。He is shivering and has light frost on the beak。“I swear it will never ever happen again！I will never insult you again！I promise！”
As he thaws，he looks up at the lady and says，“I do have one question。That turkey in there，what will he do，attack you？”
一位老太太不幸成了寡妇，她想宠物是否可以减少自己的孤独感，就去宠物店看看。她不想买小狗和小猫。就在要离开宠物店的时候，她听到一个声音说：“您今天下午看起来真可爱，夫人。”
她转过身去，想看看谁在说话，但是没看见人影儿。她只看到一只大大的绿色鹦鹉待在笼子里。她问：“那句话是你说的吗？”鹦鹉说：“是啊，是我说的。我还觉得这个衣服的颜色很适合您呢。”这位夫人突然意识到要是有一只不仅会说话，还这么会恭维人的鹦鹉多好啊。所以她掏钱把它买回了家。她说：“我可真以你为自豪，我想带你出去吃晚饭，你想去吗？”鹦鹉说：“好啊，那实在太好啦！我知道第七大街有个好地方！”
他们到了家，夫人很快上楼去房间换衣服出去吃晚饭，当然还带了鹦鹉。他们走进吃饭的地方的时候，鹦鹉开始抱怨，骂人还咬了她一下。
这位夫人都快气死了。她一把抓住了鹦鹉的喉咙，从楼梯冲到了地下室，然后把鹦鹉塞进了冰箱，放了整整5分钟才把它拿出来。鹦鹉觉得非常冷。
她说：“现在你知道错了吗？在我家里是不能容忍你刚才的语言的！”鹦鹉说：“好的，好的。我保证再也不会说那样的话了，不好意思。”还不到5分钟，鹦鹉又开始骂人了，还咬了她的手臂和手指各一下。
夫人都要惊呆啦！她一把把鹦鹉从笼子里扯了出来，然后下楼进入地下室，把它又关进了冰箱。这次她把鹦鹉关了15分钟。
终于把它拿了出来，鹦鹉快要冻死了。它浑身发抖，鸟喙上也结了薄薄的一层霜。它说：“我再也不敢了！我再也不敢侮辱你了！我发誓！”
当鹦鹉身上的冰开始融化的时候，它抬头看了看夫人，说：“我有个问题，火鸡在那儿呢，它会怎么办？攻击你吗？”
1.ease v。减轻，缓和
The aspirin eased his headache。（阿司匹林减轻了他的头痛。）
2.compliment n。赞美的话，恭维，敬意
It's the nicest compliment that I've ever had。（这是我听到的最好的恭维话。）
3.progess v。上进，提高，进步
The boy has progressed in his studies。（这男孩学习方面有进步。）
4.flabbergasted adj。目瞪口呆的，大吃一惊的
I was absolutely flabbergasted when she told me the price。（听到她告诉我的价钱，我大吃一惊。）
5.insult v。侮辱，羞辱
I'm sorry for what I said；I never meant to insult you。（我为我所说的话道歉：我不是有意要侮辱你。）
1.decide against 决定不，作出不利于……的判决
If I decide against this treatment，what are my other options？（如果我反对采用这个方法，什么是我的另外的选择？）
2.march down 沿着……行进
3.learn one's leason 吸取教训
The ability to learn a lesson from one's failure is highly regarded by parents。（我们的父母非常看重从错误中汲取教训的能力。）
