Ham. So much for this, sir; now shall you see the other. You do remember all the circumstance? Hor. Remember it, my lord! Ham. Sir, in my heart there was a kind of fighting That would not let me sleep. Methought I lay Worse than the mutinies in the bilboes. Rashly- And prais'd be rashness for it; let us know, Our indiscretion sometime serves us well When our deep plots do pall; and that should learn us There's a divinity that shapes our ends, Rough-hew them how we will- Hor. That is most certain. Ham. Up from my cabin, My sea-gown scarf'd about me, in the dark Grop'd I to find out them; had my desire, Finger'd their packet, and in fine withdrew To mine own room again; ****** so bold (My fears forgetting manners) to unseal Their grand commission; where I found, Horatio (O royal knavery!), an exact command, Larded with many several sorts of reasons, Importing Denmark's health, and England's too, With, hoo! such bugs and goblins in my life- That, on the supervise, no leisure bated, No, not to stay the finding of the axe, My head should be struck off. Hor. Is't possible? Ham. Here's the commission; read it at more leisure. But wilt thou bear me how I did proceed? Hor. I beseech you. Ham. Being thus benetted round with villanies, Or I could make a prologue to my brains, They had begun the play. I sat me down; Devis'd a new commission; wrote it fair. I once did hold it, as our statists do, A baseness to write fair, and labour'd much How to forget that learning; but, sir, now It did me yeoman's service. Wilt thou know Th' effect of what I wrote? Hor. Ay, good my lord. Ham. An earnest conjuration from the King, As England was his faithful tributary, As love between them like the palm might flourish, As peace should still her wheaten garland wear And stand a comma 'tween their amities, And many such-like as's of great charge, That, on the view and knowing of these contents, Without debatement further, more or less, He should the bearers put to sudden death, Not shriving time allow'd. Hor. How was this seal'd? Ham. Why, even in that was heaven ordinant. I had my father's signet in my purse, Which was the model of that Danish seal; Folded the writ up in the form of th' other, Subscrib'd it,gave't th' impression, plac'd it safely, The changeling never known. Now, the next day Was our sea-fight; and what to this was sequent Thou know'st already. Hor. So Guildenstern and Rosencrantz go to't. Ham. Why, man, they did make love to this employment! They are not near my conscience; their defeat Does by their own insinuation grow. 'Tis dangerous when the baser nature comes Between the pass and fell incensed points Of mighty opposites. Hor. Why, what a king is this! Ham. Does it not, thinks't thee, stand me now upon- He that hath kill'd my king, and whor'd my mother; Popp'd in between th' election and my hopes; Thrown out his angle for my proper life, And with such coz'nage- is't not perfect conscience To quit him with this arm? And is't not to be damn'd To let this canker of our nature come In further evil? Hor. It must be shortly known to him from England What is the issue of the business there. Ham. It will be short; the interim is mine, And a man's life is no more than to say 'one.' But I am very sorry, good Horatio, That to Laertes I forgot myself, For by the image of my cause I see The portraiture of his. I'll court his favours. But sure the bravery of his grief did put me Into a tow'ring passion. Hor. Peace! Who comes here?
Enter young Osric, a courtier.
Osr. Your lordship is right welcome back to Denmark. Ham. I humbly thank you, sir. [Aside to Horatio] Dost know this waterfly? Hor. [aside to Hamlet] No, my good lord. Ham. [aside to Horatio] Thy state is the more gracious; for 'tis a vice to know him. He hath much land, and fertile. Let a beast be lord of beasts, and his crib shall stand at the king's mess. 'Tis a chough; but, as I say, spacious in the possession of dirt.
